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Wednesday, September 12, 2007

Take Me Back To Happier Times (Because Today I Am a Failure).

Lately, I have gotten worse.

This morning i woke up in an awful haze. I can't blame it on the weather, because each day lately has been stunning and beautiful. I don't know whats doing it, but i feel miserable. I wasn't like this in the begining of the week, but as each day passed, things got worse. I feel as if by the weekend I will be locking myself inside my apartment.

This looming sadness just won't go away. I've tryed the things that typically make me happy.

It's not the first time i have felt like this, but some days you just wake up and hate your surroundings, your life, and possibly everything in it. This week, everyday has been like that, progressingly getting worse.

I wake up to a world that i feel like i may as well not be in. It's the days you feel like "if i wasn't here, nothing would be different".

How did i slip under this darkness and how do i climb out?

I feel my stature is constantly being judged but invisible juries. I'm not a good enough designer, a good enough friend, a good enough person. No matter what I do some days, i feel like i'm doing it wrong. I'm not content with anything, but i'm not doing anything to change it.

I have it bad.

I feel like i am forgetting all of the good times i once had, because it's clouded with visions of failure. It's days like this, I wish i could turn back time...

Help me out. I need advice.