Thunderclap

I thought this was cool. From the thumbnail view, you wouldn't be able to tell it's a Bible huh?

October. I have been working hard at Hallmark. The weather has been beautiful, and there are a surprising amount of things to do outside of work. So, this leaves me, as usual, with very little time to blog. But i haven't forgotten.

As a preview of what i might talk about in the future. I'm going camping this weekend in Oklahoma. Also, my friends are coming up for a long weekend toward the end of the month. October and November are going to be good months for music i think. I have been listening to "Dexter" audiobooks, and reading the Watchmen. I started getting a little more serious when it comes to looking for a girlfriend, and that includes online. Trust me, that will make for interesting blog posts later. Not to mention the fact that his is October, so maybe i should have a scary theme to the rest of the posts this month? And i think thats all.

Keep watching Twitter (even though i haven't been doing that much lately either).

-Josh

Upon the Destruction of Neverland

When you grow up, move out, get a life, there are certain things that come with it. Responsibility, freedom... taxes. It's all part of life. The holidays remind us all about growing up, i'm sure up to the point where you have your own kids, and you are able to reminisce about old times and carry on tradition. But i digress. When you get your own apartment, you start hosting parties, and having friends over.

Friday, i had mine. I thought it was a success. No body broke anything (bones, glasses, tv's), so that has to count for something. Next time, i will extend the invitation out to more people, but this time i wanted to keep it smaller.
Come Sunday, Laura had her get-together. I appreciated how my friends truly felt like family this year. This was probably the best Easter i have had in 5 years (at least). After an uplifting church service, we stuffed ourselves with the finest brunch God would allow our hands to prepare. We cleaned up, and headed to the park to play on the swings, and throw the frisbee around. Then we came back, had an easter egg hunt debacle, and passed out from a sugar crash while watching TV. It was a good Sunday...

also lately (to fill in the gaps);
-i did laundry (trust me it's exciting when there is that much piled up),
-i made paper globes,
-i ate ohana (not family, just the restaurant chain),
-i played some kane and lynch (for maybe the last time),
-i cleaned my apt.,
-i found a little more of myself,
-i watched Bee-Movie. (eh, it was more of a C Movie)
-i started a couple projects for myself.

The other Easter asshole,
Josh

Argyle Heart

Randomly awesome or awesomely random. In my web surfing adventures i found my computer full of nonsense, i mean research.

I'm now hitting the gym, then more Val Research today. Seize the Day!

-Josh

PS. It is bad i totally love it when Dave Matthews Band shows up randomly when my iPods on shuffle?

Damn These Awkward Hands

This was the most interesting weekend i have had in a while. Definitely in a good way.

Saturday was covered in snow. I just wish i had taken some pictures because judging by the forecast, by the end of the say tomorrow the snow and ice will only be a memory. I did manage to get out Saturday night, and it was WELL worth my time.

Sunday, today, was basically how it was meant to be, based around religion. After church this morning, we made a quick stop at Bo-Lings for lunch, and then off to more church. People see black churches on TV and in the movies, but who actually gets to experience it. I went and loved it. It was surreal. Entering the church service at 3 in the afternoon, this is what happened;
sat through 3 rappers,
2 def-poets,
2 amateur singers,
a dance troop,
a mime,
sang in 3 gospel congregation worships (one of which included the whole church holding hands),
all the while being one of six total white people,
getting out 3 hours later, and had their hands hurt and voice scratchy afterwards.
How many people can say they have done the same? If you haven't before, you should try it. Besides the fact of it being long, and draining, it was amazing.
After that, Heather, Aaron and I headed to meet up with some new friends to make gingerbread houses. Despite the fact that mine was an ugly mess, it was the perfect way to cap off a day. I had enough fun to last me a lifetime. Pictures to follow.

I really liked who i was this weekend.

This Friday, I will be making my long trek home. 17 hours. Me, my friend Emily, energy drinks, an iPod full of music to sing too, and plenty of conversation. I'm excited to be home.

The Crushing Blow.

I cried tonight. I cried for about a half an hour. I am broken. Who knew it could get any worse? Well, it did. I can't remember the last time i felt so awful. There is quite the story to go with this, but I'm not going to get into it. I called Garthy because i needed to tell someone. Thinking it was going to be a harmless conversation, thats when i broke down. Through tears and blood-shot eyes, i got down on my knees and prayed to God. I asked him to give me strength and to make things better. I felt weak and helpless... and i told Him so. I didn't know what else to do, and even though i felt guilty because i only come to God when i have a problems, i had to. At his point, getting out was the best think i could do. So, I went on a long walk down Westport to Blockbuster, and back. My heart physically hurt (and still does), and so did my head... By the time i had returned; i had spoken to many people, i was sweating, and i felt a little better. I was able to appreciate my situation a little better. I enjoyed the city by night, and actually felt like a resident — even though at the time i really just wanted to be anywhere else but Kansas City. The homeless people who stopped and asked for change reminded me how life could always be worse. After i signed back online, my friend Emily who i haven't spoke to in almost exactly a year IMed me and we proceeded to talk for hours. Was she God answering back? Whatever happened tonight... you'll have to ask me to find out... but i will never forget this time in my life for anything. I have never felt so alone in my life, but thank you to all the friends who are constantly there like Emily, and Garthy tonight. Keep me in you're prayers... i need them now more than ever...

"i dont think you want to hear this, but..."

Faith and Understanding.

From the point i got out of bed today, i was already mentally exhausted. I obviously had a tough time last night... I didn't think it would last into the morning but it did. Some things just plague your mind you know?

I haven't been to church in a while but i made Garth a promise that i would give her church a try today. So I did. I have a lot of lament toward the church, so i don't often go. It hadn't been that long since i was to church last, but there was something about going today that made it feel like it was years ago. This was actually a pleasant experience. I can't say that i will be going back every Sunday, but i regained a little "faith" in the church. It was very casual. Sort of a hipster get-together for Christian kids. The worship was like a concert. The sermon was like a conversation. The crowd was pretty diverse age wise i guess, but it was mostly people our age. All in all I had a good time. Maybe I can find a nice Christian chic to make me happy.

On topic with Garth, the group just got a spiritual 1-up with her boyfriend moving to KC on Tuesday. I'm hoping that his might mean more friends. Aaron is a terribly good guy, and I'm psyched to have him out here.

Garth and I had lunch at Chipotle after church, where we briefly talked about that, church, life, my troubles. It was a good time as always.

Full from lunch, i came back and sat around for a little while. I called Lauren and talked to her for a little while. Then later on i talked to Nick. Both were completely opposite kinds of conversation, on the same subject. The one thing they had in common was they both made me feel better, and i really appreciate them.

By the time i was finished with talking to both of them, i was pretty run dry mentally. So, of course, i thought i would punish myself more by going to the gym and getting a physical work out to go with my mental one.

While i was there i put on my new favorite show. Man vs Wild. I swear... Awesome! Bear Grylls is more man than anyone EVER. I can only hope to be half the man he is. Watching his show while working out definitely gives you more gusto to get the job done.
If you are really feeling up to it, search YouTube for the zebra clip. OH yeah. thats the stuff.

The rest of the afternoon was a blur... and now i ended up here blogging...

Night all.

Made of Mirrors

Mulheres Barbadas Spectacular illustrations, free to download and print.

That's all i have to post when it comes to interesting design news. So, yet again, I have come to the dilemma of not having anything more to post about, but i still feel compelled to write something anyhow.

I've been thinking a lot about destiny and fate lately. Does God have a path planned out for me? How do my actions shape me? My mistakes, my triumphs. There is a theory... basically everyone has heard of in some way shape or form; the Butterfly Effect. Most people have heard of it from the movie by the same name, starring the hottie Ashton Kutcher. Of course, many other movies have been based off of the same thing (i.e. It's A Wonderful Life). The basic theory of this is that the tiniest thing plays a part in the over all way things turn out. Such as, a butterflies wings create the slightest breeze from them flapping. With this, and atmospheric changes, could mean the difference between the creation or prevention of a tornado. The slightest changes in a surface could mean a different result each time. A drop of sweat rolling down your brow will make a different route each time because of tiny variation in the skin. Did I lose you yet? In a larger picture, it's called the Chaos Theory. As I see it, it's saying things happened the way they did for a reason. With even the slightest change to your everyday life, this could have a ripple effect changing millions of other things that could happen in your future. I can't say i have had the easiest life, but i certainly haven't had the hardest by any means either. I feel the events leading up to this point in my life have made me the person I am today. My move, my heart breaks, my friends, my job, my family. I feel like some people don't sit back and use what they have learned. But at the same time, there is a balance, where you can't live in the past either. I hope I can live my life to the fullest and get all that I can out of it. You only live once right? But, I am doing my best to just let things pan out like "they were meant to be."

"why can't you treat me the way that you want to be treated"

My Greatest Sin

So i traded in my bibles and earlier morning church services, for sleeping in and McDonald's breakfasts... i feel pretty guilty about it every morning. i don't know if i will ever get over it either. I don't think i will ever do anything to change it though.

today was a good sunday. after mcdonalds breakfast, and some much needed conversation, we had shish-kabobs and smores... from a grill neither of us knew how to use. i got a hair cut (and i have to say it looks pretty darn good), played with riley, did some laundry. obviously, the grilling with heather was the best part.

last night was the decemberists concert. amazing musicians. missed it? go here. this is the definition of irony. this conversation starts out. "this is why i really hate you tube. situations like this." Colin seems like a really cool level headed dude.

My birthday is next weekend... yey... i'm not really that thrilled... we will see what goes on that weekend. i'm supposed to get my tattoo... but i haven't been thinking about it enough to have a design ready.